My Neurodiverse Voice
The week following my post (that I was Neurodivergent) truly was a surreal roller coaster.
On the Thursday following that post, I participated in my contracting employer’s DEI panel on Neurodivergence. I came out publicly regarding my ADD, PTSD and being on the autistic spectrum, and although I’ve presented on panels and even made public presentations before groups many dozens of times – it was always about WHAT I did professionally – either in IT or as a writer. This time the subject was me, and who I am, which was quite nerve-wracking new territory.
But – it was also liberating. The freedom to speak openly about how I learned that I was neurodivergent, how it has impacted me and the coping mechanisms I’ve developed was empowering, in the sense that I didn’t need to pretend. I could honestly share what it was like to be me, openly and without a mask – something I first began to experience in a limited way under my pseudonym.
Afterward, the positive feedback I received was almost overwhelming, including someone who shared that what I said helped her understand how to work with her own neurodivergent child on a whole deeper level. All my life up to this point, I never thought or felt that what I had to say mattered – but for at least a moment, my words mattered significantly to someone.
Then – after a weekend processing all that (in my own neurodivergent way) I started jury duty on the following Monday. The universe (coincidence or not???) assigned me as juror #11 to a civil lawsuit involving – yes – DEI issues, neurodivergency, accommodations and bullying in a hostile workplace.
Over the course of two intense days, we prospective jurors were all questioned by the judge and both lawyers on those topics. I ended up talking about everything (quite literally) that I had discussed (and more) during the DEI session just days before – but this time, under oath, in the jury box.
Although in the end I was struck from sitting on that jury, it was a deeply profound experience. For two days I spoke the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth about being neurodivergent.
I think the universe is trying to tell me that my voice does indeed matter.